An eye opener

Tonight a brave amazing group of woman spoke out the truth about secondary PTSD this is part of the video
http://m.cbsnews.com/postwatch.rbml?pageType=video&cbsID=50135002
And here is the story http://m.cbsnews.com/storysynopsis.rbml?pageType=eveningNews&catid=57548725&feed_id=29

As I listened to them speak their words especially Brannan (whom started family of a vet ) and a woman that has reached out to me early on thru Facebook . Her words made me cry . I have not cried over what I'm dealing with in so long . But being an auditory person her words hit me hard. Yet she is a much better person than me. Because she takes care of her wounded husband . I don't really take care of Ryan anymore since he took off in may . Yes I did do everything i could to get him help at the VA , I got him into the shepherd center in Atlanta . I kept hoping and praying for my family to get a miracle . But it hasn't happened . He is the most distant and disconnected he has ever been . Sure maybe I could beg him to come home . But I don't out of fear for my children . See I noticed my own children were showing the signs of secondary PTSD due to their dad . I am still constantly undoing damage . Anger , hurt resentment . I don't really know if I suffer from it . Sure I'm exhausted from being the only parent . We have no family that cares and I am serious. No one from his family calls us . I have suffered recently with some health concerns I'm not sure what . Possible vertigo .
I can not begin to express how I'm feeling . My girls watched pride ad prejudice tonight . They are so into the fairy tale the love stories . All it does is make me deeply sad . Maybe it's the deep disappointment in how my life has turned . I am trying to play along because they were so into the movies and when mr Darcy finally kissed the girl .....at least they can see how they should be loved ....I wasn't suppose to be living my life alone . I had the marriage . Now I just have my precious children .