A lot hits me . A lot runs through my mind . Sometimes I feel so alone . Even with Sebastian plastered against me holding my hair .
I have many whom are friends . But I still feel alone . Like everyone has distanced from me.
My longtime friend whom I used to talked to often doesn't seem to want to call me
Back . Actually a few good friends seem to have just abandoned me. Friends whom have talked to Ryan. It bothers me . I feel betrayed in a way . It's as if some feel all of this is my fault . Ryan has a way of making people believe him .
But I know the truth and so does God.
It's like im out of sight out of mind .
I am still here alone raising my blessings as best I can . I love my children . Though I don't think they know that all I do is for them .
I'm numb a lot . I wonder what the future holds . My children will marry and move on . Life will slow . But I will be alone . I married for life. But that person that life is gone . Some tell me I'm young and could easily marry again. I feel old . I feel so out of shape no one would want me.
No this isn't a pitty party tonight . Just what rolls through my mind .
I am blessed I know . I know God is with me . Why do I feel alone ? Why do I feel scared .
Sleeplessness stinks .
you are not alone, but you are. Your friends just hate to see how sad you are and they can't help you.You look great, you are great. Join a club, make new friends, stop talking about him. He isn't hurting you as much as you are hurting you. After a year I divorced him and moved on with my 3 little ones. That day was the first day of the best of my life. If he came back as much as you would want to you could never forget this pain.
ReplyDeleteThank you Linda. You are right and I have said it before. I could never forget the pain he has caused.
DeletePlease hang in there Lisa! Forgive your friends too because they may just not know quite what to say.... We all have to pray for one another because we never see the whole picture of the lives of our friends and acquaintances. You are not alone:))
ReplyDeleteLove you Rosemary. It was great talking to you last week. I DO forgive all the time.
Deletethinking and praying for you tonight. I have suffered with depression for a long time and there were times that people didnt want to read my blog much less listen to me complain or just try to share how I felt at the time. People dont know what to do or how to help. Its clear he moved on and when God releases you, you should move on also. Hang in there, pray and you will be happy again.
ReplyDeleteOh Annette! I do read your blog when I get on the blog. It has not been a lot lately. I guess I am different. I DO like to read others stories of life. IT shows we are not alone. God Bless you!
DeleteThat is so true, I always blogged about what I was going through because I knew others out there were dealing with things very similar,. I wasnt saying I dont want to read your blog... just an explanation of what others may feel. You are not alone! Praying for you always
ReplyDeleteThank you Annette!
ReplyDelete